If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! Psalm 139: 8
For some, darkness is an everyday occurrence. We wrestle with demons at night; the wounds and pains that run replay through our mind. Morning dawns with no desire to get up and enjoy a day ahead of us. There is no joy ahead, only the dark gloom of an unwanted day.
You finally climb out of bed because of obligation or duty, but not because of joy. Life goes on, in the same rut. Maybe the children must be fed, work has to be done. Trudge on, trudge on. Let’s make it through the day, even if all you want to do is sit and wish the day gone.
This is not something you can easily snap out of; it’s easier said than done. Depression doesn’t work that way. You feel that there is no one who understands or can help. You are alone in the journey and you prefer alone; as much as your heart cries for someone to love you, you also push others away. This is your battle. Besides, who wants to be with miserable old you anyway?
You cry for help, inside, but laugh on the outside. You pretend life is just fine when it couldn’t be worse. The valley is dark and deep, and heaven is no where in sight. You feel depressed and alone.
But you are not alone. The one who loves you most, who thinks about you continually. He sees all your tears and puts them in his bottle of remembrance, He is the one who knows the number of hairs on your head and sees you and is even with you in your valley of darkness.
In the verse above, it says “if I make my bed in Sheol, he is there with me”. What is Sheol? Sheol is the place of the dead, dark place where spirits of the deceased go. Does it sound a bit like where you are right now?
There, in the depth of darkness, God is with you. Where misery is, so is light, so is love, so is comfort. He is waiting to lift you up, hold your hand and take you to heights unknown. If you call out to him, he hears you. If you reach out your hand, know that he is there, even if you don’t feel it right away.
It might take time to know he is there. That is okay. There is no rush, take your time. Think about what the verse is trying to tell you. If the verse brings you any comfort, cling to it. Read it over and over until it becomes a truth that encourages you and lifts you up. Someday the light will shine, and you will ascend to heights above the valley, maybe even there may be days on a mountain top. Everyone has spells of depression, and you might have a fallback time, but don’t despair; God is with you, even “if you make your bed in Sheol, he is there with you”. Take his hand and he will help you climb up the valley banks again.
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One thought on “The Valley of Darkness by Helen Khan”
Another great post, Helen. Definitely needed for encouragement in these trying times. God bless you